Open letter to NYC cab drivers

Dear NY cab drivers,
I know your job sucks. Driving around all day and all night, picking up annoying, often drunk, people who leave lousy tips, having to drive people home to Brooklyn, knowing that you won't be able to get a fare back into the city. I feel for you, I really do.
If I am getting a cab home to Brooklyn it is because it's too late to take the subway safely by myself. I tip well. Therefore it would be very nice if you could restrain yourselves from:

1). Telling me that you have cancer and your wife just had a stroke and that it is my fault that you will be losing money tonight because you are taking me home to Brooklyn. (Especially after a Leonard Cohen show - thanks for bringing me down from my Leonard Cohen show with a fucking CRASH).

2). Complaining about lousy tips en route before we have got to my destination. It's not going to make me tip you more, quite the contrary.

3). Trying to make me get out of the cab when I have already got in. I am paying you for a service - I don't assume that you driving me home is for free.

4). Talking my ear off about your problems. I have enough of my own thank you very much. You are not my family or my friend.

However, if you are the lovely Russian driver from Odessa, or the awesome Indian driver who sings songs to me and gives me bangles - I adore you and wish there were more of you. Thank you for making my late night trips home a pleasure more than a nightmare.

There - I got that off my chest now I can move on to my next thoughts.